If I were to hope for more than I have dared to imagine,
would you fail me?
I cannot bear the thought of disappointment
much less the true weight of its reality.
And yet the greater tales and scenes and moments
will not let me forget --
demanding that my heart dream bigger,
at least bigger than the dreary outlook of my eye or ear.
For it is not a frivolous choice to hope,
it is a necessary one.

hello tiny moon -
small enough for one eye to hold you whole in the frame of my bathroom blinds
yet great enough to hold sway all the waters of the sea by the power of your call.

I hate when I lose myself to fear.

Because it is nothing more than the foolish dreams
That woke me up disturbed
And preyed on me unceasingly
Until the words were spoken that broke their spell.

Oh busy, painful, hectic, angry, driven, wicked world
spare my soul
a moment to be still
guarded by this silent, cloudy sea.

This year June gloom arrived in August.
And I find that I am not depressed,
But rather soothed by its hushing stillness.

I heard once the tale of Akeldama. The story is of heartless betrayal, remorseful anguish, bitter justice. Who would betray the Messiah? What unending darkness must infect the soul to lead any man towards that garden kiss? Was he impervious to love that he could look into those eyes of limitless compassion & tenderness and turn away? Dastardly soul! I am appalled.
Until I am still. Then I see: I too have kissed the offered cheek in heartless deception. I too have turned my eyes away from the piercing gaze of Him who knows me best and loves me anyway, chooses to love me.
For I am Judas. I live in a Field of Blood.

sometimes i long for you
in a deep aching way
that's hard to express
except through tears